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Dates don’t have to be elaborate or expensive in order to make a positive impression on a woman, but they do have to be creative and personal. In this article I will give you three  “Rainy Day Date” ideas around San Diego so you can plan a romantic date with your sweetie the next time it rains.
sweetie

#1 Go to a playhouse

Women like to dress up and feel beautiful, they also like to be warm too. So when planning your date (either for an indoor or outdoor playhouse) make sure to prepare your date for the weather. You don’t want her to be so cold that all she can think about is going home and putting on her fleece pj’s. While at the playhouse, take the time to celebrate the fact that you don’t have to come up with an engaging conversation. Sit back and enjoy the show.

A few local playhouses that I recommend: Old Globe, Lyceum Theatre, La Jolla Playhouse
sweetie

#2 Dine at C Level

Because the sound and ambiance of the rain is naturally romantic, go somewhere where you can hear it (without getting wet). Both the indoor and outdoor seating sections are cozy, and the outdoor section has both heat lamps and fireplaces to further enhance tone of your date.

One more thing, C Level usually offers coupons online that can help you save a few dollars.
My favorite thing to order is the Kemo Sabe Nut-Crusted Brie, and the Skirts on Fire Steak Salad.
sweetie

#3 Find a quaint bistro that has a fireplace, hot cocoa, and possibly board games

Sometimes the casual dates can be as equally endearing as the fancy dates. Grab your girl and take her to your favorite coffee or dessert shop, sip warm libations, talk, and maybe even play a card game. Life is too short to be so serious, mix it up and I guarantee that by the end of your evening, your date will have more reasons to admire you.

A few quaint spots I like: Pannikin Coffee & Tea, La Jolla’s Living Room Coffeehouse

 

 

Lindsey Nicole Isham is a national speaker and author of the book No Sex in the City, the brutally honest and often hilarious story of Lindsey’s quest for sexual purity in the face of a sexually-saturated society. Lindsey is a thirty-two year old relationship guru, the ultimate girly-girl, and a PR junky.

To find out more about Lindsey Isham, visit: www.lindseyisham.com, or follow her on Facebook: facebook.com/lindsey.isham and Twitter: @lindsey_isham.

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Whether you are boycotting VALENTINE’S DAY, or really excited to share that day your sweetie, if you are NOT MARRIED, this event is for you!

I am excited about speaking at this event and I hope you all can come!

College, Singles (25-39), Singles (40+)

Description:

Join us for a community-wide singles event! This fun-filled evening of music and comedy will feature Taylor Tomlinson and ‘No Sex in the City’ author Lindsey Nicole Isham. The brutally honest and often hilarious story of Lindsey’s quest for sexual purity in the face of an impure culture, baffled peers, and sexual desire is an encouraging message for singles of any age. Refreshments will be available at the break. Donations will be accepted at the door.

Location:

Newbreak Tierrasanta
10791 Tierrasanta Blvd, San Diego, CA 92124

Dates & Times:

Starts: February 11, 2012 7:00 PM
Ends: February 11, 2012 9:00 PM

For more information:Contact Ray Traynor at singles@newbreak.org or visit: http://bit.ly/yj9XPv Lindsey Nicole Isham is a national speaker and author of the book No Sex in the City, the brutally honest and often hilarious story of Lindsey’s quest for sexual purity in the face of a sexually-saturated society. Lindsey is a 32-year-old relationship guru, the ultimate girly-girl, and a PR junky. Read more about her at lindseyisham.com, or follow her on Facebook and Twitter.

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Guys Give Dating Advice to Single WOMEN

When you’re not really interested, don’t try to spare his feelings. If you suspect he likes you, or he says so, be up front and firm. He’ll be better off knowing than if you let him think there’s a chance.

As for the ones that don’t take no for an answer (especially when there’s no chance you’ll change your mind) ask another guy you trust to make it clear… but only when you’ve had a firm, definitive talk first.

Also both my wife and I had a list of the things we wanted. If you don’t know what you want, how can you tell? And yes, God can give you your list, he did for both of us! – Joel

Don’t go alone if you can help it. Get a few friends together and make a double date! – Paul

Well, just like men, there are two kinds of women….players and grown-ups. If your a player….GROW-UP, and that’s all I have to say to you until you do.

If you’re a grown-up now and still looking for advice from me, I might say that you have started out correctly, so just be patient….with yourself and with your suitors.

Trust your instincts and you’ll do fine. If you start to suspect something; confront him immediately. You have GOT to be able to trust each other for there to be love. If he fails to properly expain himself after the confrontation, FLUSH him INSTANTLY…PERIOD. – Andrew

Don’t do the nervous talking thing. Even if the guy is quiet and it feels awkward, still try to step back and make him initiate some of the conversation. Show self confidence. Don’t be afraid to talk about your faith, or to ask him about his. And smile :)  – Aaron

Just be yourself -Bernardo

Be honest all the time and do not lead us on, we have feelings too. – Robert

Don’t be afraid to let a guy know you’re interested. You don’t have to be like “Hey, I like you” but you can at least initiate conversation. – Sam

Find a man you can trust as a real friend before you just jump in something. – Clarence

Not just out of courtesy and respect, but if you really care you will PUT THAT CELL PHONE AWAY! I hate talking to someone who has a texting/twitter/facebook addiction! – Leo

Try not to completely disregard a guy who is shy. – Michael

For more information about about being sexy, sex, dating, relationships, and trusting God:
Buy the Book!

No Sex in the City
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Lindsey N. Isham

www.lindseyisham.com
facebook: lindsey.isham
twitter: @lindsey_isham

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Thought from my reader:
Dear Lindsey, it is hard to be single and I feel lonely A LOT… If I am being honest, I wish I were married by now.

My response:
Summertime in California sometimes makes it difficult for me to be holy and sexually pure. I am from Colorado where people wear parkas for the majority of the year. In San Diego however, summertime includes half-naked muscular guys at a beach! But keeping my thoughts pure is only one of the difficulties of being an older single woman during the summertime; the other is the lack of having a husband and a family to share it with. Summertime is more fun when you can share it with your loved ones.

Because I am single, and many of my best friends are married with kids, I am constantly asking God what He wants me to do with my free time (especially on the weekends). I don’t want to be busy, I want to be fruitful. I know God holds me accountable for my time and I don’t want to waste it by wishing I had something else (like a husband and a family). But sometimes being single feels lonely… and apparently it is starting to show.

This summer at my friend’s baby shower I met and (apparently) completely astonished a pregnant woman my age. She asked me what I do for a living and when I explained my book she said,

“Well, I would have never guessed that you are 32; you look so young! And I had no idea that you are a virgin and single; you don’t look like a virgin. I mean, you look so happy… and you are so pretty!”

I wasn’t sure how to respond to what seemed like a back-handed compliment, but then I realized what her words implied; single women my age tend to look sad, bitter, or depressed because they are lonely and want to be married.

Her words struck me. Not only do older single women tend to look haggard – which is never a good thing- but by looking depressed the chances of an older single woman ever getting asked out or married are dismal. Who wants to look like that? What guy wants to date a woman who looks like that?

I am not going to sugar-coat the truth, being a single 32 year old virgin can be hard, frustrating, and lonely at times. Recently I realized that I haven’t been asked on a date in over two years… and I am not getting any younger! At the times when I get sad, confused, or frustrated about my singleness, God always graciously reminds me that I am not alone; I have Him.

Although I sometimes wish I had a tall, dark-haired, muscular husband who I could love and make love to, it is in those times of loneliness and discouragement, that, if I am able to take my focus off of myself and redirect my focus to God, somehow He comforts me.

So, instead of feeling depressed and looking worn-down, how fun would it be for single women everywhere to totally revive what it means to be a single woman!

We don’t have to look haggard and we don’t have to feel like we are all “called to singleness.” Instead, we can be fruitful and useful so that when God is ready to bless us with a husband, we are ready! And if God never brings us a man, we won’t feel like we wasted our singleness. After all, God was the one who breathed life into us and He is the one who can take it away. If we spend all our time pining about our singleness, it’s not our time we are wasting, it is God’s!

Singleness is either making you bitter or better. Choose the latter!

This article was featured in Hope For Women Magazine: http://bit.ly/nYas3s

For more information about about being sexy, sex, dating, relationships, and trusting God:
Buy the Book!

No Sex in the City
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Lindsey N. Isham
www.lindseyisham.com
facebook: lindsey.isham
twitter: lindsey_isham

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Facebook is supposed to be something fun; a way to connect with people you haven’t seen in awhile… but for many couples, Facebook is tearing apart their relationship.

Status Update: “In a Relationship”

Usually the fact that you are now in a relationship is a good thing… but what if the person you are in a relationship with doesn’t want that information to be public? Some people feel that if you don’t announce your new romantic relationship to the world via Facebook then there is something wrong with you.

The overly analytical types start to wonder, why you won’t change your status to “In a Relationship.” Are you not proud of me? Are you committed to our relationship? Are you having second thoughts? Are you cheating on me? Are you embarrassed by us, and our relationship?

If you are supportive of updating your relationships status, how long do you need to be in a relationship before you update your status? What kind of communication needs to happen in order to do so? Who makes all these unwritten rules anyway?

Comments From the Opposite Sex

As if the above thoughts aren’t enough to be concerned with, there are more. What if you are dating a guy whose wall is covered with gorgeous women who have left comments for him, asked him questions, or have asked him out? What do you do? What should he do?

“Friending” Exes

Who is it okay to be “friends” with on Facebook? If you are married or in a relationship, is it okay to have “friends” of the opposite sex? Husbands, what if women (who you don’t know) send you a “friend request,” should you accept it or reject it? What if an ex (who you know is probably still in love with you – or maybe isn’t) sends you a “friend request,” should you accept or reject the friendship? What if they write on your wall, comment on your pictures and posts, should you keep the comments or erase them? What if your exes send you personal messages, and start asking personal questions?

Although the Bible was written years ago I think it has a lot to say about Facebook and how to handle these types of situations. Most of the above concerns can be resolved with three easy words: Love, Honor, & Trust.

Love: If you really care for someone, you will not insist on your own way. (I Corinthians 13:4-8)

Honor:
Your status, updates, friends, accepted comments, friend invitations, etc. should always honor God and the other person. If you are truly honoring the other person, you will remove any flirtatious, sensual, suggestive images, and comments from your page and you will refrain from posting such things on other pages. (Job 40:10, Proverbs 3:35, Proverbs 11:16, Proverbs 20:3, Proverbs 21:21, Proverbs 29:23, John 12:26, Romans 1:28, Philippians 4:8, I Peter 3:7)

Trust: If you are dating or married to someone you cannot trust, or if their actions are making it harder to give them the benefit of the doubt, talk to them. If your Facebook page in any way gives room for others to question your level of commitment to that relationship, avoid it. Pray about it. Trust God first. Ask Him to guide you. ( I Corinthians 13:4-8)

Relationships are hard enough as it is; don’t argue about the petty stuff like relationship status on Facebook, but don’t allow your Facebook page to be an open invitation to temptation and other sins either… because if you don’t put up any boundaries, odds are your relationship will either end or suffer greatly.

For more information about about being sexy, sex, dating, relationships, and trusting God:
Buy the Book!

No Sex in the City
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Lindsey N. Isham
www.lindseyisham.com
facebook: lindsey.isham
twitter: lindsey_isham

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Have you ever been on a date without knowing you were on a DATE?

It is always interesting when a guy asks you to spend time with him (because most guys are vague about their intentions). Their vagueness is probably because they think that if they say, “would you like to go on a date with me?” we will say, “Ew, gross; why would I ever go on a date with you!”

Fear, rejection, the unknown, and stereotype that all women are “Man-Eaters” makes dating a little confusing sometimes.

When I was in high school and a guy said, “Do you want to hang out sometime?” I ALWAYS assumed we were friends. Friends “hang out” romantic interests go on dates.

Of course I understand it is hard to ask a girl out on a date!  But wouldn’t you rather ask a girl out on a date than take her on a date without her knowing it was a date? Especially if you have a great time… wouldn’t you feel better knowing she was interested too… and NOT just thinking you were her FRIEND!

It was my junior year in high school and I spent the majority of my time golfing. I was trying to earn a scholarship to college and since I didn’t learn how to play until I was fourteen, I had a lot of catching up to do.

In the off-season I decided to learn karate; I thought it would help with my balance, posture, and core… that and I thought it would be really cool to break boards with my bare hands!

There was a guy in the class who I found out went to my school. He was a little shy or socially awkward, anyway, I kind of felt sorry for him because he didn’t seem to have too many friends.

One day after class he asked me if I wanted to hang out with him… I thought of it as an opportunity to show him more of Jesus. When he called to confirm he mentioned something about Red Robin so we met there.

He randomly told me that his mom hates Christians, not exactly the way I saw the conversation going… and this was before I shared my faith with him.

While we were at dinner, I made conversation and tried to make him feel less awkward, but I soon found out that he didn’t think we were “just friends.”

As the server came to the table take our order, my “friend” said something to the waiter along the lines of “and my date would like…”  WHAT DID HE SAY? Whoa, I didn’t know we were on a date; he never said it was a date.

My head started spinning.

Now what? Now I have to have a conversation with him at some point to let him know that I did NOT think we were on a date; I thought we were just friends…oh boy.

No big deal. No one knows we are here or that my “friend” thinks we are on a date… and then this bad non-date date got worse.

He began to talk about how he loves to do magic tricks and he asked if I want to see some. I thought it would be a good diversion to my thoughts so he pulled out his cards.

I thought it would just be a simple, “pick this card and I will tell you which card you have” kind of trick… oh but it wasn’t.

He pulled out cards alright, but he decided he needed an audience.  During one of his card tricks (yes I said one… he did card tricks until the bill arrived) there were at least 6 servers surrounding our table and drawing attention to us.

I learned a lot from that non-date date. I learned that it is hard for guys to ask a girl out. I learned that when guys ask, “Do you want to hang out sometime” to clarify and ask if they are asking me to go on a date. If not, it it’s okay, but I think I deserve to know their intentions. I also learned to encourage guys as often as I can; they have insecurities too and it doesn’t hurt to give them an occasional encouragement boost.

For more information about about being sexy, sex, dating, relationships, and trusting God:
Buy the Book!

No Sex in the City
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Lindsey N. Isham
www.lindseyisham.com
facebook.com/lindsey.isham
twitter.com/lindsey_isham

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In addition to being a National Speaker and Published Author, I am also a Fashion Consultant.

Fashion consulting is a rewarding business and each client consultation is unique and tailored specially to their wants, needs and if they are married – their spouse’s wants and needs.

My initial consultation with a client begins in the client’s closet. We go through each clothing item, accessory, purse, shoe, etc. and establish which items we will keep based on the 3 F’s:Fit, Fashion, Flattery.

FIT:

I have the client try on every item; and as she does we see if the item fits. Many women change sizes and hold on to outdated clothes and sizes. I only recommend keeping the client’s current size in the closet. (If they insist on keeping the other sized clothes we put them in storage in another place in the home).

Your clothes need to fit.  I know this seems like an obvious fashion tip, but you probably own things that do not fit you. When clothes are too big or too small women tend to look manly or like “Frump Girl.” No woman wants to look like either of those.

FLATTERY:

Once you have decided that a clothing item is the correct size for you, next you need to evaluate if it is flattering on you. Every woman’s body is different and just because an item looks attractive on your friend, in the magazine, or wherever you first noticed it, IT DOESN’T MEAN IT LOOKS GOOD ON YOU.

Check out some of my previous fashion articles about dressing for your body type and colors that look best on you.

If you are married and your husband has a certain opinion regarding clothing he thinks most flatter your figure, why not cater your tastes with his preferences?

Many of my clients – as we are going through their wardrobe and later while shopping for new clothes- inevitably try on an outfit and say something like, “My husband doesn’t like this style on me, but I don’t care.”

Anytime one of  my clients mentions their husband’s dislike of a certain style, I suggest the client listen’s to her husband. Here is why, if in marriage a husband and wife are supposed to “become one,” then why would a wife purposefully do something that she knows displeases her husband - in any area that is not morally wrong – regardless of her reasoning?

Wives, if you know that your husband loves to see you in a higher heal – I am not suggesting you have to wear high heals all the time-  why wouldn’t you at least wear them when you go on a date with your husband? It is possible to find heals that are comfortable to wear for short periods of time.

Whether it is coloring your hair, growing your hair out, wearing dresses more, etc., it should make you happy to make your husband happy.

FASHION:

Fashion trends come and go, but an outdated wardrobe is easy to spot: stained clothes, bleach marks, pants too short, piles on sweaters, clothes that are boxy, etc.  I am NOT suggesting you go to the mall today and buy clothes you can’t afford. I am also NOT recommending you fill your wardrobe with all of the latest trendy items.

I recommend that you visit the mall occasionally; browse through Nordstrom and other classy stores to get ideas of the latest style trends and how to wear them. Nordstrom can be expensive, but you are mainly there to get ideas. You can always take those ideas with you to places like Ross, TJMaxx, etc.

You might still be wondering what your closet or wardrobe has to do with a marriage retreat and I am about to tell you.  Wives, every once in awhile your marriage needs a little boost.

Men are visually stimulated… I can’t emphasize this fact enough!

Since we know that men are visually stimulated, every once in awhile it is good to evaluate yourself and your wardrobe to ensure that you are doing your best to be a woman who visually stimulates her husband.

Your husband is surrounded by women every day, dress and carry yourself in such a way that even if Jennifer Aniston worked with your husband, he would still spend his day thinking about you and how beautiful you are.

This suggestion is not only one that works, but as I travel and speak, I have many conversations with men and every one of them has asked me to remind wives about the importance of looking attractive for her husband.

Wives, when you do everything within your ability to eat healthy, workout, wear clothes that fit, are flattering, and fashionable, both you and your husband will feel like you went on a marriage retreat. Ladies, when you wear pretty clothes, put on a little make up, and style your hair, you too will feel prettier.

When a woman feels prettier, she becomes more confident; because of  her confidence, a wife is more likely to want and desire sex and less likely to feel embarrassed about her insecurities.

She will also more  feel more desired by her husband.

Your next marriage retreat should start in your closet… but what about the single ladies? The same things apply – you want to get a husband someday (well most women), start planning so you are ready when the time comes.

**As I write this article I just want to remind everyone that first and foremost our desires must be in alignment with God’s. We must first and foremost desire to bring him glory and have a pure, obedient heart. Our desire for the Lord and our Love for others will be what really attracts a husband to his wife, the recommendations above do not negate these simple truths, they only compliment them**


(Here is a sneak peak into my wardrobe… I don’t have many clothes at all, but I am good at mixing and matching them!)

For more information about about being sexy, sex, dating, relationships, and trusting God:
Buy the Book!

No Sex in the City
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by
Lindsey N. Isham
www.lindseyisham.com
facebook.com/lindsey.isham
twitter.com/lindsey_isham

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